Building resilience in children is a challenging yet imperative life-long skill. Together as parents, caregivers, teachers, and our supportive school community we can all implement and encourage strategies, to foster resilience in our children. In essence, building resilience in children is about equipping them with the tools and skills they need to navigate the ups and downs of life and thrive. By fostering resilience, we empower children to become confident, resourceful, and emotionally healthy individuals.

Resilience in children, the ability to adapt and bounce back from difficult experiences, provides numerous benefits:

1. Emotional Regulation and Management
2. Problem-Solving Skills
3. Increased Self-Confidence
4. Adaptability to Change
5. Stronger Relationships
6. Mental and Physical Health
7. Positive Outlook and Purpose

Building resilience in children involves creating a supportive environment, promoting positive self-talk, teaching self-care, and fostering a growth mindset. Resilience also includes encouraging problem-solving, embracing challenges, and developing strong relationships. 

A supportive environment provides a safe place for mistakes and uses these as an avenue for growth and learning. Mistakes happen to everyone and assessing what went wrong, problem solving what can be done differently in the future and seeking to get a little better with each attempt, over striving for perfection is key. A supportive environment also provides consistent routines and open communication of thoughts, feelings, and ideas.

Promoting positive self-talk can be difficult when as parents and caregivers, we are often our own harshest critics but being kind to yourself and speaking about ourselves with grace and understanding is important. Our children see and hear us call ourselves names when we forget to turn off the stove, or to put the washing in the dryer. Their inner voice is formed from what they witness and how we speak to them, so forgive yourself and acknowledge mistakes with empathy and compassion. Practice self pep-talks when completing challenging tasks and affirmations of self-worth.

Self-care has recently become the ‘it’ word yet doesn’t have to be an elaborate retreat or an excuse to avoid daily tasks., It is however, important to take time out of our busy days to enjoy life and look after our minds and bodies. Children again learn how to self-care and its importance on wellbeing. We can teach children the importance of enough sleep, eating a balanced diet, exercise for mental health purposes, and embracing life’s little joys like walking in the sunshine, having family park days, and helping others, as ways to foster these habits in our children. Practicing gratitude is a wonderful way to reflect and change our mindset as well as take a time out for self-care and reduce stress.

A growth mindset involves understanding our potential for growth and learning and the simplest way to impact our children’s mindset is through praise. Endeavour to praise EFFORT over BRILLIANCE, for example, “Wow, you must have tried really hard on those tricky bits.” Instead of “Wow, what a good job, you are so smart.” When facing future challenges, children who receive praise for effort, are able to demonstrate persistence and resilience during even the most complex of tasks, whereas children praised for being smart or naturally ‘good’ at something, are unable to cope with the loss of this identity, when presented with challenges that, in their minds, prove it to be wrong. Fixed Mindset: I’m either good at something or I’m not. Growth Mindset: I can improve my skills with effort and practice.

By implementing these strategies, parents, teachers, and other caregivers can help children build resilience and thrive in the face of challenges.

The Community Support Centre Innisfail has free Circle of Security Parenting training commencing on the 2^nd August for parents/carers interested in understanding their children, emotions, connection, and needs further. Call 40438 400 or click this link to enquire/register.

Triple P Parenting also offer many free online courses to assist with building resilience in your children.

Jessica Lang

Guidance Counsellor